Babalik siyang “stronger, braver, wiser, kinder, better”.

Pansamantalang nagpaalam si Kris Aquino sa kanyang followers sa social media, dahil kailangan niyang magpahinga, base na rin sa payo ng kanyang mga doktor, para hindi siya ma-stress at para makabawi ang katawan niya habang ginagamot.

Naunang umuwi nitong Biyernes ng gabi, galing Singapore, ang mga anak ni Kris na sina Joshua Aquino at Bimby Aquino Yap, dahil may medical procedure pang gagawin kay Kris bukas, Lunes.

Vic Sotto, nasaktan sa ginawa ng TAPE sa Eat Bulaga

Humihiling si Kris ng pang-unawa sa lahat, at panalangin na rin para sa agaran niyang paggaling.

“Be back soon as I Heal, Stronger, Braver, Wiser, Kinder, Better,” ito ang nakalagay sa Instagram post ni Kris, complete with photo habang nakasakay siya sa isang yate, na ang background ay asul na dagat.

Ipinost din ni Kris ang lyrics ng awiting Better In Time:

“Hurt my feelings but that's the path I believe in, And I know that time will heal it, If you didn't notice, boy, you meant everything, Quickly I'm learning to love again, All I know is I’m be OK.

“Thought I couldn't live without you, It's gonna hurt when it heals too (Oh yeah), It'll all get better in time, And even though I really love you, I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to oooh, It'll all get better in time.

“Since there's no more you and me, It's time I let you go, So I can be free,

And live my life how it should be, No matter how hard it is, I'll be fine without you.

“Yes I will, Thought I couldn't live without you, It's gonna hurt when it heals too (oh oh oh), It'll all get better in time. Leona Lewis, Better In Time.

“For closure, because it will be many weeks, this song isn’t about a single individual, it expressed my accepting the need to let go of what had always been my one great love—the passion I had for my craft, and my being my father’s daughter.

“The happiness I felt working in the field that required being in the public eye. That’s why I could take the trolling & bashing (just not the fake/made up stuff)—because this life was my CHOICE. But my sons deserve to have the most significant VOICE. And they want a healthy mama.

“No drama, straight from my heart, I’ll miss you... like crazy.”

NEUROLOGIST, DOC NI LEE KUAN YEW

Samantala, Better in Time rin ang titulo ng napakahabang blog ni Kris, na pinost niya sa kanyang Facebook page nitong Biyernes, bago mag-hatinggabi, na may mga litratong kasama ang buong pamilya niya. Mayroon ding mga importanteng events sa buhay, niya kasama na ang pagiging brand ambassadress niya, at ang mga medical procedure na ginawa sa kanya sa Singapore, habang kausap ang kanyang neurologist.

“Dr. Lee (my neurologist), I am blessed to now be under the care of the man who was Singapore’s Founding Prime Minister Lee Kuan Yew’s personal physician for 12 years—now you know why I didn’t object to the 2 MRI tests.”

Ibinahagi ni Kris na gusto na niyang bumalik sa rati ang pakiramdam niya, gayundin ang nangyaring self-accident sa bahay nila, at habang ginagamot siya sa ibang bansa.

“Not an overly lengthy explanation about the state of my health, because those closest to me won’t even ask for it, all they want is for my overall well-being to improve. Those who doubt me, hate on me & enjoy bashing me don’t deserve to know what my now is. Those who still care for me will thankfully understand why I am choosing privacy. And those I love will simply support my today’s how, what, where, and when.

“I’m being as straightforward as I can be, BUT even with my expert team of medical specialists, the unhealthy days still outnumber the good ones, and I’d be irresponsible sharing a definitive diagnosis and my ever-changing treatment regimen, because my autoimmune issues aren’t textbook ones. My symptoms and reactions to medicine are contradictory to what’s expected, so it would be careless to post something confusing.

“Truthfully, I miss the old me, the one who felt fulfillment from being a workaholic, wasn’t constantly bedridden for days because of extreme fatigue, muscle weakness, nausea, or dizziness; the one who used to enjoy eating and didn’t find food consumption a struggle; the one who slept well at night, not when the sun is rising until mid-afternoon; the one who could go to Church, malls, cinemas, and restaurants without fear that her immune system couldn’t handle it; and I miss the one who could brisk walk while traveling, wasn’t helpless that her sons have to take turns holding her hand to keep her steady, and also take turns with Bincai whenever in the bathroom because of the times she had dizzy spells and fainting.

“I believe you’ll know a person’s true character, not when life is smooth and all is rosy, BUT when there’s palpable suffering and a need for some time away. Separation will clearly show your value to each other, distance will highlight if you feel something important is missing, or if you feel that living is now carefree and unburdened.”

MANILA BULLETIN, PINASALAMATAN

Pinasalamatan din niya ang pahayagang Manila Bulletin, dahil dito siya nasulat nang lumantad siya sa publiko.

“You’ve been my longest relationship—36 years since I first came into the public’s consciousness in 1983, because BULLETIN was brave enough to give the 12-year old daughter of Ninoy Aquino an interview which they put on their front page.

“I’m the girl who welcomed you to witness almost every portion of her existence. Kuya Josh and Bimb have both grown up for all of you to see. But for now, I’m closing certain doors and windows into our lives.

‘SO THAT I MAY RESET PROPERLY’

“My reason is simple, I need to HEAL... in every aspect of my being... for me to take care of my 2 boys who have seen and experienced way too much of both the good and bad, but for almost a year, it’s really been the physical pain and emotional disappointment that they’ve had to live with.

“And as the only constant parent in their lives, it’s my duty to put them FIRST. I cannot erase their undeserved pain, but I can emphasize how much I’ll do to get physically stronger and with emotional prescience release the broken parts of me to FREE US from our sorrow because at least that’s within my control. Sadly, there’s no changing what had already occurred. But the life lessons from that chapter have already made me an even more responsible parent.

“You’ll wonder why I worked from October 2018 to early May of 2019 knowing it wasn’t in my body’s best interest, again that was for my boys. They couldn’t see their mom just crumble no matter how difficult life had suddenly turned... for them to be less afraid about what the future may hold. I had to stay STRONG... so I soldiered on to reassure them I wasn’t giving up. Was it the correct decision? For that time frame it was, but now I know deprived myself of the chance to turn off in order to get a full overhaul so that I may reset properly.”

PIONEER SA DIGITAL PROGRAMMING

Buong pagmamalaki ring nakuwento ni Kris na siya ang unang celebrity na nagsimula ng digital programming.

“I am proud of the fact that I was the first celebrity to go into digital programming because that was the only avenue open to me. The reality is I remain political collateral damage, a humbling I’ve accepted, because ours is a deeply divided country. But digital is now a very crowded field, and this quote for me is part of my TRUTH, ‘You cannot heal in the same environment where you got sick’. Trying to create viable webisodes with brand partners was a shared vision with Nicko (Falcis) and one I gave my all to continue, in order to honor commitments, but there was so much about the state of my health I ignored, because I willingly paid such a high price in my desire to stay ‘relevant’.

IMMEDIATE GOAL

“My immediate goal is WELLNESS, although it’s clear to me, my autoimmune conditions have no cure. That’s my FOCUS for the next few months: get my immunity stronger, concentrate on the parts of me where I have a chance to be better, and strive for HARMONY where it’s possible. Pragmatically, I cannot do that without adopting PRIVACY.

“I expressed that I kept my comments open, regardless of the trolls, because it also gave me the opportunity to read some of the kindest, most compassionate messages from people who don’t know me and my sons personally yet invested their time and prayers for us. To all of you, please know how much you uplifted me when I was at my lowest.

“I hope to come back on IG & FB when I look & feel healthier. YouTube is something I’d be excited to do if I could partner with someone for a LIVE talk show.

“You and I deserve the REAL me, not the angled, filtered, photoshopped me to make me look less frail and gaunt...that’s why I am surrendering to God’s timing.

“Ecclesiastes 3: NLT - 1 For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. 2 A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest. 3 A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up. 4 A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance. 5 A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones. A time to embrace and a time to turn away. 6 A time to search and a time to quit searching. A time to keep and a time to throw away. 7 A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak. 8 A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace.

“Proverbs 23:NLT - 15 My child, if your heart is wise, my own heart will rejoice! 16 Everything in me will celebrate when you speak what is right. 17 Don't envy sinners, but always continue to fear the LORD. 18 You will be rewarded for this; your hope will not be disappointed. 19 My child, listen and be wise: Keep your heart on the right course.

“I read these passages nightly to remind me that God is in full control and all He asks is for my faith to remain strong. As I write this, my sons fly home tomorrow, I’ll have 1 more procedure done here in Singapore (Alvin and Bincai will be with me) then we’ll fly home after a few days of recuperation.

“I now only pray for PEACE in my heart, about what was and what is and OPTIMISM for every new day, because as Emily Dickinson wrote and for many of us it became a famous quote because of THE FAULT IN OUR STARS, ‘FOREVER IS COMPOSED OF NOWS’.

MATINDING CHALLENGE: TRANSITION

Nabanggit din ang tungkol sa mga product commitment ni Kris, at ang pakikipaglaban niya sa kanyang mga sakit. Nabanggit din na ang ilang KCAP staff niyang mawawalan ng trabaho ay binigyan niya ng magandang separation pay habang naghahanap ng ibang trabaho.

“My IG feed shall be quiet. I am unsure if we have any other brand commitments for airing, but I do know I have a few endorsement shoots to do. I am being 100% truthful, being Kris is the only job I’ve known how to do since I was 15 years old, so the next few months of transitioning into a regular civilian will be a challenge, yet I need it in order for me to get healthy enough to not have the worst manifestations of my autoimmune disorders on such a regular basis.

“I know the risks, most especially ‘OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND’ but being private and alive for Kuya Josh and Bimb is an easy choice to make. I know that everyone is dispensable and replaceable, because who am I kidding, I’ve already had 3 years to live with that as my REALITY. Nope, this isn’t a pity party, I’m stating life as it is.

“My sons and I are stable enough that I can step away from work without making those who stayed loyal to me in KCAP suffer significant income losses but rather I have made sure they’ll have enough financially while exploring other job opportunities.

“Those in my home will all remain okay. Most importantly, I can take care of me, while not depriving my 2 sons. I know how blessed we are. That’s why I know apart from my ailments, I shouldn’t question nor complain.

‘SO AFRAID OF TIME’S POWER’

“In closing, September 27, 2018 was a significant time in my life when I was confronted with my mortality, I was so afraid of time’s power, and how little control I had over it. But when I decided to befriend my NOW, every day feels like a GIFT. I thanked God for Christmas, New Year, my birthday, Bimb’s birthday, and kuya’s birthday we got to spend together.

“All I am trying to impart is that how you live life is based on your current perception of events, priorities, and your sense of where your peace is most effortless. I now cherish more, those worth living and fighting for. I have stopped giving the privilege to anybody, who dares make me feel less than what I know I am, and I embrace self-love and self-care, because they are valuable partners that go hand in hand in order to complete the person I can still become.

“My mom always believed that we must undergo suffering as part of God’s way of molding us in preparation for where He has predestined us to reach: We must first gain strength and wisdom, become more compassionate and be able to show more empathy, develop humility and patience, and be faithful and grateful in all of life’s circumstances by not having an easy life. Yes mom, message has been delivered loud and clear.

“They say you never forget a person that mattered, but please let me take that further and say, I pray I was that gracious guest you once allowed into your personal space on a daily basis for 20+ years. The one destiny was smart enough to not allow to overstay her welcome, and now she’s matured enough to not want to burden you with her problems. Thus she will hold on to that spare key you gave her as a parting gift, because somehow for enough of you, once she has HEALED in body and spirit, her authenticity earned her an open invitation to visit your homes and hearts once again.”

Mula sa pahayagang BALITA, get well soon, Kris!

Reggee Bonoan